so. you're here. eh.

if i only knew...
I feel like reminiscing today...When I first met Casey, as an Ispace officer he had a name tag on his tee. It said, "Casey. USA," but he crossed out the "USA" and wrote "Texas" above it. LOL. Some people think it was because in American states are competing with each other, but I think it was because Texas used to be a COUNTRY and it's likely that present-day Texans want to set themselves apart...You know what I mean...Good ole time, back in the days when he had no idea that soon he would have to start hiding in bushes at the sight of me. LOL. He also was wearing Abercrombie and Fitch cargo pants and on the violent wind that swept the city that day, he said, "I like it when the weather goes to the extreme you can't make up your mind..."
And he's 25 already, maybe almost 26. Four or five years go in a blink, so before he knows it he's hit 30, and that's a ripe old age. Er...not really. I've started to think 35-yeat-olds are sexy! LOL.
Awww Pitas sucks. It doesn't have a time setting feature so I have to change the time from GMT + 7 to GMT + 12 myself before publishing each entry! Also it's high time Pitas kept up with time. There's been NOTHING new here since I first logged on in 2001!
Yes Alex, couldn't agree more with ya...Those two are sooo overhyped! Except the first one actually has talent. The other one should just stick to modelling, right where people don't see her as "another pretty face." However, if Indo film producers put these two together in a movie, that movie would be the highest-grossing one ever.
My mate Carl's last name is ACTUALLY Greenstreet. LOL. When he first mentioned it I thought it was "Queenstreet", which is the name of a street downtown.
EDIT: I must give up on Casey. God help me if he does show up at the poetry-reading with his girlfriend.

Listening to: Gil Ofarim feat. The Moffatts - If You Only Knew
Tuesday, September 27, 2005, 07:05 a.m.

bete bete and bete
You know what I really HATE? When you're frustrated and people, instead of giving you hugs and soothing words, tell you mockingly to fuckin' "grow up." "Welcome to real life, sweetie." "Shame on you. Big girls don't cry." Keep telling me this sort of things and I'll tear your mouth like Kong tearing the mouth of the T-rex in King Kong. These people completely forget that everyone is just as fragile when they're down, even though they might appear tough on the outside.
Casey is one of those guys I'm sooo crazy about I send them running for dear life. If he does show up on Friday's poetry-reading, I don't know how I'll face him.
I've always been craving affection and attention since I don't remember when, and I don't know who's responsible for this. I'm gonna stop blaming my dad. What makes it worse is that whenever someone tells me to think about someone out there who thinks about me 24/7 and is even willing to die for me, I can only think of my mum.
Oh well. Gotta do homework.
EDIT: This morning again I called Casey and left him a voice message, despite knowing full well that it would be fruitless. In this message I told him flat out that I had a feeling we could be friends. I'll be lucky if he thinks I was on booze when I made the call, because then he won't be freaked out and pretend not to see me when we run into each other again.
When I'm not making grammatical errors, I'm inarticulate.
My aunt must have told my mum that I haven't vacuumed my room in ages, because the latter reminded me to vacuum my room by text TWICE. Man I hate vacuuming carpets. The dirt just sticks to it so you need to press the vacuum cleaner to it, and it means harder work. Nonetheless, today I eventually vacuumed my room because I could no longer stand the sight of my carpet. Mind you, even though I have a love-hate relationship with vacuum cleaners, I'm not a messy person.

Listening to: Tori Amos - Cornflake Girl
Monday, September 26, 2005, 06:43 a.m.

you are my voodoo child, my voodoo child
1952 movie Singin' In The Rain is DA BOMB! It's probably the best musical comedy ever made! Grab the movie on DVD, and I guarantee it's the best remedy when you have a bad day. Jean Hagen, who played the super vain silent movie star Lina Lamont, was a dead ringer for Anna Nicole Smith in terms of appearance and voice that if Hollywood producers ever want to make a remake of the hit they would cast her as Lina Lamont! But nah...I don't think there would be a remake. In 1998 there was a remake of 1960's monster hit Psycho by the same title, and it flopped.
Next week in FTVMS class we'll be discussing European movies, especially the French new wave, so last Friday the screening was a 1960 movie by Jean Luc Goddard, Breathless. The movie is ho-hum. I've seen it twice and I fell asleep both times. Although the plot is rather exciting (about a criminal who's on the run to Rome with his American girlfriend, but the girlfriend later betrays him by reporting him to the cops), there's no thrill nor suspense. Everything goes just flat.
I'm currently reading another Banana Yoshimoto book, Asleep. Now I know the trademark of her books. Each of the stories always involves a charcter going through the belongings of a dead person with memories of the latter flooding in. That's what always carries me away. I can feel exactly what the character feels, and I think this is where Yoshimoto's strength lies. No matter how bizarre her stories can be, there are always sequences that readers can relate to, and they make paths to their feelings.
BTW, here a joke that I got through a text message from my Indian mate Sam, who could've gotten it from someone else...

A husband tells his wife, "You know what "wife" stands for? Without Information Fighting Everytime!" Appaled, the wife replies, "No, it stands for With Idiot For Ever!"

Listening to: Rogue Traders - Voodoo Child
Sunday, September 25, 2005, 04:25 a.m.

I should reward myself whenever I succeed in keeping my cool. As I'm basically quick-tempered, it's rather hard, especially when I'm in a state of depression like this (well yes I am...been secretly crying on the bus since the earliest days of school and now even little things upset me.)
I finally told mum about my financial situation and she's agreed to send the money faster, this Monday (but it won't get to my bank until Thursday or Friday.) Once the money's arrived, I'll buy a beautiful silver necklace with a heart pendant that I saw in a jewellery shop in the city as my reward. I don't care if you smart alecks are gonna tell me it's not a good decision because gold and diamonds are worth more. Mind you, unlike most girls, I don't give much thought to jewelry.
EDIT: I don't get that Sky City job. Hahhaha...they got back to me sooner than expected and one of their reasons is...that my English isn't good enough. But of course, they put it mildly by saying it "needs improvement." Aaaw what the hell...this means I can go home in November. INDO I'M COMIIIINGGGGGG!
My neighbor is probably having an '80s Michael Jackson-themed party since '80s Jacko hits are played so loudly and people are singing along to them.
You know...I'm supposedly down and out now. I've been denied a job at Sky City, my uncle was rude in the morning, I have lots of assignments due in early October and I'm running out of ideas, and Casey is probably trying to make himself believe I'm non-existent...but no. I cried myself a sea yesterday and I don't want to scare people with my bulging swollen eyes. I'm still young, and I don't wanna waste my life feeling stressed out.
My mum's care package arrived today and it was one of the things that cheered me up. And omigod everything in there was pink!!! Whee! LOL. But I was surprised to find she packed only ONE pair of my earring collection, the blue oriental ones she bought me in Singapore. Oh well.
Don't you think Carmen Electra looks TOTALLY HIDEOUS with blonde hair?

Listening to: Bond - Breathe
Saturday, September 24, 2005, 07:38 a.m.

bad bad bad...
Nana's "get over them" rules:

  • When things don't work out with your love life, pretend your man is gay.

  • When people disregard you by not replying your text messages and/or not keeping your number, consider them dimwits who don't know how to operate cellphones.

  • Orchid, Johnny, God, and mum are good and I should give them more credit than I already have.

    Listening to: Kate Bush - King of The Mountain
    Friday, September 23, 2005, 04:52 p.m.

    If the the header image isn't self-explanatory enough, this blog is mine and therefore I'm entitled to do anything I please with it. If you don't like me as a person or don't like what you see, then why on earth are you here, of all places? If you can't say anything nice, go get yourself an online space to rant in. Don't do it in other people's. Maturity is key, folks.

    Twenty-two. Taurus. Indonesian passport, New Zealand residence. The UI grad, UofA freshman. English literature major, films and media studies minor. Budding psychic (?). In the midst of quarter life crisis. Spoilled brat, but not rich nor rotten. Always color-cordinated. Mother tongue is Bahasa Indonesia. Travels include Japan, France, Singapore, England, Australia, Malaysia, China, and USA. Usually knows more than she lets on. Single and looking. Blogging since 18. Graphic design, poetry, and photography are pastimes. Quirky. DA. LJ. More?

    agatha christie edgar allan poe the 1920's jackie's strength//tori amos beautiful couple...they should hook up again!

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