my giant shell...

because we are born with more than five senses
They say those are secrets...Yet they post them on Facebook.

I want you to be my last. The last I kiss and embrace.
Same here, darling.

Don't hide it, love. I know.
But even so, sunshine, I'm not defeated.

Listening to: nothing
Thursday, October 25, 2007, 03:04 a.m.

people that are unable to make up their minds are losers
Ok, so I'm supposed to let the world know I'm cool and unaffected.
But I'm in no mood to get an Oscar nod for Best Actress at the moment.
Oh God I don't wanna end up with him. He's ugly.
No darling I don't mean you. Tell the boys to shut the fuck up.
EDIT: I can picture him singing JT's What Goes Around Comes Around to me in all his ignorance and vengeance. Now that's amusing.

Listening to: nothing
Wednesday, October 24, 2007, 12:36 a.m.

no sense and all sensibility
My name really should be Marianne Dashwood.
EDIT: Cooled off a bit now. God how I miss my enlightened period, and little did I know that the enlightenment was only temporary. Perhaps you've noticed already that I've sort of burnt out. Gone is the 'don't worry, be happy, do your best and God will take care of the rest' Isyana, replaced by the 'AAAARRRGGGHHH I'M 24 AND THE WORLD CAN'T BE MORE CRUEL' me. In the past month I've been denied a job, not doing well at uni (this is old news actually), and hating Friendster because the coloumn for latest updates are full of wedding and baby pictures. Not to mention the most recent tragedy that slapped - no, kicked - me across the face. My twenties march on and I really don't wanna see myself in exact same place next year, with the only change being a degree in my hands.
But there are traces of the enlightened me left within. I guess as soon as exams are over I'll pick up where I left off, and embark on the much-awaited road trip...Meet exciting new people, and who knows, maybe even the love of my life!
Must get back to studying :)
EDIT II: Oh Indo. My dear, dear Indo. Malaysia's been one bitch of a neighbour aye. Good thing we've secured the Batik though.
Times like these, I figure out how I can support my country in whatever way I can...while still away and never return.

Listening to: Bee Gees - Tragedy
Sunday, October 21, 2007, 01:17 a.m.

not in the mood to play hide and seek
God don't fuckin' hide things from me. I hate people that hide stuff from me. Especially when they can tell I know they're doing it and am uncomfortable about confronting them. Sheesh.
Look, if you think I'm one hell of a big joke, tell it to face. If you think I'm a mess, say it directly. My parents have been brutally honest to me for 24 years, 5 months, and 4 days (as of this moment) so you know pretty darn well I'm used to painfully honest opinions. I might cry and it might give a bad day, but at least I wouldn't give you one of my nasty moods for days on end.

Listening to: nothing
Thursday, October 18, 2007, 07:38 a.m.

someone to love you without being told...
Ok, I guess I should stop lying to myself. I need love. I'm lonely. And I'm constantly told to let it go, that love comes when I least expect it, and to get a life dammit. Well thing is, I DO have a life. Most of the time love issues come when I REALLY should be doing something else, like finishing an essay. And what if I always long for love? Does that mean I'll never get it no matter what? And yes I fuckin' do want a relationship. And when I'm in one I hope it will be my last. I'm tired of all the heartache and the tears when the relationship has a messy break-up (which in the past was often the case). I need to love and be loved. I don't care that you run for dear life on reading this. Go run. Run Lola run. Hahahahaha. Well, if you run, chances are you're childish and I wouldn't even consider a date with you.
Enough rambling, I need to get back to essay.

Listening to: Natasha Bedingfield - Soulmate
Wednesday, October 17, 2007, 12:37 p.m.

Hey everyone.
Happy Eid.
Yes I had a happy one.
But I'm in a CRAP mood now.
Why do you have to hide it all? I'm a big girl, you know that. And a strong one too. I appreciate that you do it because you worry about me, but you're not saving me pain. No. You're giving me MORE pain. Tell it to my face. If you can't tell it to my face let me see it. It wouldn't give me a heart attack. I've stood tall through bullying, rapes, back-stabbing, and whatnot. Come on, bring it on. Try me.
This whole thing is a joke. Funny I actually thought it would be ok.
Oh and a few of my friends think you're dumb.

Listening to: nothing
Tuesday, October 16, 2007, 03:28 p.m.
19. 20. 21. 22. 23. 24. Grew up in Indonesia, currently resides in Auckland, New Zealand. UI alumna, a third year at AU doing a BA in English Literature and Films, next stop is either Yale or NUS. Into photography, world music, graphic design, and whatnot.
Stalk me:

The picture was taken by yours truly in Northhead, Devonport, on April 21 2007 using a Nikon D70 belonging to The University of Auckland's Photography Society. As usual, the layout was coded by me and other images except the ones for fanlistings, cliques, and quizzes were created by me as well using Adobe Photoshop 7.0. Don't steal.


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