my giant shell...

funnily ambiguous
Renee: well, that's when he made the vow and made it official, at 19. That's a milestone in his life. He just keeps straying...
Me: laughed up a storm.
There, ladies and gentlemen, goes our version of The Firecrotch.

Listening to: Zelkjo Joksimovic - Crnokosa (sooo loving this song...whip out the English version already!)
Saturday, June 23, 2007, 02:13 a.m.

I should be in bed...
Yet another wee hours entry from yours truly. Hm. I'll try to write longer this time.
I ran into Brian at K Road. We had a joke, and during a fit of laughter I made a major grammatical error. And it was quite loud. Ouch. How embarassing! But living in an English-speaking country as a foreigner with English as a third language really makes me take things a bit easier. Back in the day when I was a UI student making straight A's for grammar for six semesters in a row, a minor grammatical error would make me wanna kill myself.
Brian. He's half Pinoy and half Caucasian, hailing from California, and here as an exchange student. Oh god. How come most of the dudes who made a move on me are mixed? Other than Bri-bri, there are Von (a quarter Caucasian, three quarter Pinoy), Jeff (half Chinese, a quarter Samoan, a quarter German), Caleb (half Samoan, a quarter Croatian, a quarter Scottish) and Carwyn (half Maori and half Welsh). In addition to those guys there have been only two Pakeha dudes to approach me in the past two years since I moved here, Tom and Peter. Not a single Asian nor a Maori/Pacific Islander. Which makes me wonder: what kind of appeal do I have? Back in Indonesia, most of suitors are Chinese Indonesians. Hmmmm...
And no, long-time readers, these luk kreungs don't excite me or anything. I actually gave up on mixed guys in 2004 when I fell madly in love with Freddy, that German asshole. And who can forget my, uh, infatuation with Casey the Texan in 2005. But yeah, I can feel my 20-year-old self patting me on the back.
Right. Heading to bed now.

Listening to: nothing
Friday, June 22, 2007, 02:26 a.m.

cliche touche
Aww you. I loved it when you made me admit my feelings for you on (where else?) level 0. I loved it when you reached for my knee and just extorted those sacred words out of my mouth.
Next time we're stuck on level 0 do it again, mkay?

Listening to: nothing
Thursday, June 21, 2007, 12:21 a.m.

because you are your ego
To prove your mate is wrong, don't be up front. Don't blatantly attack the ego goddamnit. Because if you do your mate would never admit he's wrong. Never. He'd only resent you and (a) stop talking to you altogether or (b) prove that YOU are wrong.
This is something people, young and old alike, desperately need to learn.

Listening to: nothing
Wednesday, June 20, 2007, 04:07 a.m.

the glum entry
Adrian Mole's blind bestmate Nigel's guide dog is called Graham.
The bed is warm. So my kindy teacher told me and fellow five-year-olds in the classroom. The bed is warm, the floor is not. It is warm. I want to jump right in, but something always keeps me until around frikken 04.00 in the morning. Whether or not there's an essay. Goddamn adulthood and its plethora of responsibilities.
Childhood is good. Children don't experience this...disconcerting longing.
Children love toys and mummy and daddy. They don't love...Ah well. Nevermind.
My left hand is so dry and wrinkly nowadays. I thought it was all thanks to winter's arrival but no, for my right hand is not. The rest is my body is not. When I apply hand cream on it gets soft and normal, but only for...what, less than an hour? What the hell is going on? I'm so going to the dermatologist.
Don't you just hate it when someone tries real hard to outshine you in every way? When you say you fail one out of four papers, she says she passed all five of her papers with straight A's. When you say you have to live on lousy Chinese takeaways because you live on your own and your apartment's got no kitchen, she says her mum flies all the way from Indo regularly to cook her gourmet food (eh? Hahahhaha ok...). When you say your boyfriend dumped you, she says her beau has just bought her the latest LV release. Sounds familiar? Well, it certainly does to me. Just disregard this person. Don't feel annoyed. Feel sorry instead. Feel sorry that she's sooo damn jealous of you she feels the need to brag about her luck - which comes very seldom as opposed to the frequent presence of yours.
EDIT (1:58 PM): I can't explain the sudden urge to blog in my mother tongue. Apologies to my non Indo-speaking readers.
Haduh. Gaswat beybeh. Anak2 se-club udah pada tau lah gue ada crush sama si *****. Lagian elo sih Na jadi orang obvious banget. Wadaw malu deh eyke...Males nongol ah di ball taon ini. Trus mau ngapain donk liburan Agustus ini? Balik Indo? Cuma 2 minggu gitu? Anyway nanti deh dipikirin lagi.
The sleeves of my lovely grey Dotti babydoll top feel tight on my arms. Is it just me or did it shrink during the last washing? Hang on a sec, I got the top back in April and obviously since then the top has been washed numerous times but the sleeves have never felt tight before...Hm. Must be me piling on more kilos. Bloody winter.

Listening to: nothing
Saturday, June 16, 2007, 02:45 a.m.

totally random
When you know perferctly well that your 23-year-old homestay stayed with her mum for 22 years, you don't lie about her to the mum. That's just plain stupid. If you do, alas, I'm afraid you have to get your IQ checked. Wouldn't be surprising if it turns out to be double digit instead of triple.
I love Keiko Matsui although her songs make me sad...

Listening to: Yanni - Nostalgia
Friday, June 15, 2007, 11:10 a.m.

cium tangan dong sayang
There's this oh-so-adorable three-year-old boy called Shin Yen (not sure that's how his name's spelled), son of one of my flatmates (never know her name). I usually meet Shin Yen and his mum cooking at the common kitchen at dinner time. When I first met him, I was surprised to see he didn't kiss the back of my hand when we shook hands. Then it struck me that I was in New Zealand, not back home.
In Indonesia, kissing the back of one's hand is a gesture of respect. It's performed by youngsters to their elders. Kissing the back of the hand is one of the gestures taught to early on, so when you visit Indonesia don't be surprised to see wee little kids reach for your hand and kiss it.
Also it's done after a pair of newlyweds exchange wedding vows. The bride would kiss the back of her husband's hand to show that she'll respect (and in most cases, obey) him and the husband will kiss his wife's forehead to show he'll love and protect her for life. Whether or not my husband is Indonesian I'd peform the kiss-the-hand thing...did I mention we'd have an traditional Indonesian wedding? LOL. Even if my hubster isn't Indo and therefore our kids are half-half I'd still teach them to kiss the back of their elders' hands. It's a good thing I grew up doing, and why not pass it on to the next generation toh...
Ok, ok. I need to stop. I've been talking about marrige and kids like there's no tomorrow and it's scaring the shit out of him.
Also, I'm in dire need to clean my desk. It's the dustiest desk in the universe.

Listening to: nothing
Thursday, June 14, 2007, 12:14 p.m.
19. 20. 21. 22. 23. 24. Grew up in Indonesia, currently resides in Auckland, New Zealand. UI alumna, a third year at AU doing a BA in English Literature and Films, next stop is either Yale or NUS. Into photography, world music, graphic design, and whatnot.
Stalk me:

The picture was taken by yours truly in Northhead, Davenport, on April 21 2007 using a Nikon D70 belonging to The University of Auckland's Photography Society. As usual, the layout was coded by me and other images except the ones for fanlistings, cliques, and quizzes were created by me as well using Adobe Photoshop 7.0. Don't steal.


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