I wish Friendster had existed from the days of my relationship with Pipi, for a couple days ago I found the Friendster of one of the girls he cheated on me with. I merely inserted her first name (Pi never told me her full name) in the user reach, and voila! Why sweat old stuff you ask, especially when she and Pi are not connected on Friendster, and I doubt if they're still mates at all? Ask yourself, is it hard to forget things that hurt you so much? But don't worry, I didn't and never will go yell at her...
I don't know, maybe it was a bunch of birds telling him that I'm now fatter than I was last year, or some paranormal told him that having a spouse who shares a birthday with a sibling means bad luck, but the most sensical explanation to our separation is two stone-headed bulls in one ring spell disaster.
Today, except Rindang and Ravel, the dudes I talked to were boneheads. What's wrong with you blokes?
Thursday, September 16, 2004, 10:29 p.m.

Y'all know that I major in English, and minored in advertising and Turkish (now I'm done with Turkish and have switched from ads to tourism). And that obviously means I've gone through 3 years without mathematics of any kind. But, weird thing is, throughout the 3 years I've been doing math of all sorts, albeit simple, in my head. For example, recently a mate of mine told me he was 1/16 German. That left me counting 1/2=50%, 1/4=25%, 1/8=12,5%, so 1/16=6,25%. I did it IN MY HEAD, without a rough draft, let alone a calculator! I've also done simple chemistry in my brain. Forexample, I sometimes refer to soap as basa, its chemical name. And when faced with all the things fruity, like a bottle of honeydew flavored milk I have in my refrigerator now, I go like, "Quick, name the chemical molecule/particle that smells and tastes like honeydew! Ethil Butena?" Oh my God, I'm driving myself nuts.
This thing, however, leads me to consider giving math another try. I sucked at math and the like because I was pressurized by school, even though actually I knew all along that I could do them well. I mean, I was good at math in grades 3 and 4, and in grade 10 I even found chemistry fun! Now that I'm no longer pressurized to get good marks in both subjects plus physics, I'll have my high school math teacher (he's a close family friend) teach me from the basics, and we'll see things from there. If I can excel in math, then whoever things my talent only lies in languages will get a nice kick in the ass. Oh, I can also take down the anti math clique code that's been on my site for 2,5 years.
My best friend Orchid is now taken! Yay! The lucky dude is called Akbar, who goes to college somewhere in The Netherlands. Hence the LDR, but so far (they've been together for only...4 days?) they're doing fine...Akbar constantly checks on his baby and Orchid doesn't mind one bit. LOL. How sweet. He asked Orchid to be his girl just a day before he was to fly back to Holland, and he also had to beat another bloke called Andre who had asked for her hand earlier. I like it when blokes struggle to get their girls!
I think they'll make a good couple, since their names can be linked together, OrchidAkbar (so Orchid's REAL first name is Orchida). Aren't I so old school! LOL. When I was in high school, many young couples believed that if their names (either nick or first) could be linked together by the first or last letters their relationships would last forever. Hahahah. I don't know if today's high schoolers still have the same belief.
Can I have a moment of silence please? This is the 3rd anniversary of 9/11.
Saturday, September 11, 2004, 08:57 a.m.

I'm grateful for my decision, and feel sorry for her, sometimes. The way a bloke treats his mum now is the reflection of how he will treat his wife later. He may be the epitome of a good boyfriend now, but that doesn't mean he will be the epitome of a good husband or dad in the future.
Friday, September 10, 2004, 10:31 p.m.

This is the second post for today. I don't normally do this, but whatever.
It is NOT useful to me. So not useful I'm putting it up for auction.
Recently there's been a prank call from the number +62 817 5228 748. Well well, the paramedics in charge of this patient should be fired as they're incapable of doing their task.
My heart goes out to all the casualties of the September 9 bombing of The Australian Embassy. May God be with you, and yes, FUCK TERRORISM.
Thursday, September 9, 2004, 05:30 p.m.

A couple days ago, I was at a small cafe near Lia's house in Tebet with Lia and Nita when the news programme on TV broadcast the news of the sudden death of Munir on a Garuda Indonesia on the way to Utrecht, The Netherlands, of either a heart attack or a murder by some intel agents. Lia asked me who Munir was and I said I had no idea, then she asked Nita the same question. Nita thought he was a House of The Representatives member. Y'know what, right at that time I felt utter embarassment. I mean, I didn't know who Munir was, although his face is very familiar to me, yet everybody knows I read a lot. I'm well-read, for Pete's sake! A learned young woman! So anyway, it wasn't until I browsed the Jakarta Post website that I found out Munir was a human right activist. For shame!
We used to walk down by the river...He loved to watch the sun go down. I swear I left him by the river. I swear I left him safe and sound.
Taken from Hazard, Chapter Two by Richard Marx, with necessary changes. I just wanna stop being on the sad side...
Be careful what you wish for, for you may just get it, even though you don't have a genie to grant it. I speak it from a recent experience. If you're a regular, you must remember me rambling about how I miss my last ex so much and that I should've had sex with him when he asked me to. That was before we started talking again, and one thing led to another until last week he asked me to spend the weekend with him at a hotel. Although a little voice in me suggested I accept it because I might regret it later, another one assured me that I was still sane enough not to lose my virginity to a guy who isn't even my boyfriend.
Take a look at the top right corner of this page. You'll find the words 'on-off clairvoyance' in the Missy part. And guess what, it's on again! I'd been playing Richard Marx's "Hazard, Chapter Two" in my head while thinking about its video lately until yesterday I actually saw it on Channel V! I also had a strange dream last night. I dreamed that a family friend, a Turkish chef at the only Turkish fine-dining restaurant in Jakarta, died, causes unknown. Weird thing was I kept waking up in-between the dream, relieved it was just a dream, only to fall back asleep to the same dream. I know what triggered that dream. I've heard of so many deaths lately, and recently there are two deaths in the past couple of days: Munir's and M. Yusuf's, an ex minister of national defense. But y'know what, some of my dreams did come true...
Thursday, September 9, 2004, 08:15 a.m.

Readers...I can't stand it anymore. I just want to release my bottled anger in full now. And it's in Bahasa. Sorry.

Koko...kenapa jadi begini? Kenapa koko langsung matiin telepon begitu aku bilang hallo? Koko masih marah yah gara-gara aku matiin duluan waktu itu? Kalo iya, aku minta maaf lagi deh ko...Koko bilang dong, jadi aku ngga nebak-nebak begini. Bikin bete tahu!
Koko, aku sayang sama koko. Sayang sebagai temen, sebagai kakak, although mungkin koko nggak suka. Aku tahu lah aku nggak mungkin saingan sama Frida, so please...jangan misintrepret rasa sayang aku sebagai suka yah. Aku appreciate banget koko bisa tahan ngadepin aku selama hampir tiga tahun terakhir ini, and aku harap kita bisa temenan sampai lamaaaa...Although, yah...sekarang friendship kita lagi di ujung tanduk, what with our refusing to talk to each other. Koko nutup telpon aku, aku delete koko dari Friendster, ICQ, MSN, HP, lagu-lagu yang koko kirim, semua...
Aku emang marah ko. Aku ngerasa di-taken for granted gitu. Kesannya koko cuma mau deket sama aku pas koko lagi single aja. Tapi sudahlah...aku nggak tahan lama-lama marahan sama koko. Sakit tahu. Makan hati. Makanya aku tumpahin semua di entry ini, bodo amat deh kalo koko or Frida baca. Ngga baik nyimpen bottled anger lama-lama.
Ko, hari ini pun ada yang mau aku ceritain ke kamu. Although koko nggak selalu respond, aku tahu koko dengerin....

That's it. I've let my heart have its say. Now it's my brain's turn...
Get out (leave!) right now. It's the end of you and me. It's too late (now!), and I can't wait for you to be gone. I wanted you right here with me, but I had no choice you gotta leave coz my heart is breaking...
Taken from Leave (Get Out) by Jojo.
Tuesday, September 7, 2004, 06:21 p.m.